Today. It was six months ago today that I said Hello & Goodbye to my sweet daughter. Wow. When we had that moment in June, December seemed a lifetime away. And now here it is. December 10. That date was illumionouse to me. I have been waiting for this day. Today it is officially ok to to try to have another child. But what all does that really mean? Life is so much more complicated now, yet is it much simpliar too. How can it be both, but it is?? I am surviving. We are living. I am no longer just exisisting. I was speaking to another Mama of an angel baby. We have come to the conclusion while the date is important, the time that has passed is more significant. We need to acknowledge the time. The suffering that has taken place. Not the date. We need to remember the short life that our babies had. What a perfect life that they had. They knew no suffering. They only knew love. Every need that they ever had was met instantanously. What a beautiful life they had.
I miss my baby girl Alexa every day. I wonder what could have been. I am living. I am breathing without effort, for the most part. I love you baby girl. So much.